my dog wears my clothes

I have heard about separation anxiety in people but never really thought it could apply to my dog.  Everyone says that Buckeye (who is now 2 years old) is ridiculously attached to me, but I just fluffed it off as non-sense.   When my mom stayed with me she said that he would sit from the time I left at 7 am for work to the moment I walked in the door at 4pm by the front door staring out of the side light window.  She knew when I was near the house because he started crying and carrying on running like a maniac from room to room jumping from couch to couch and in her words “announcing I was home”.  

As soon as I would walk in the door he would bully his way past my other two dogs and jump into my arms. He literally would stand on his hind legs (making him just a few inches shorter than me) wrap his front paws around my neck, tuck his head into my shoulder and just hug me like he remembered that I saved him by adopting him.  At first I thought it was so cute, but then his anxiousness started to turn destructive.

He went from waiting for me all day to getting annoyed that it was taking too long to get this work thing over with. Now don’t get me wrong – when I got home I got the same loving honeymoon greeting, however, I would also find my shoes eaten, the bread from the counter top on the ground and thrown all around – but not eaten??.  He worked his way though all my shoes, my roommate’s shoes, my mother’s shoes, purses, wallet and credit cards. He tore apart every single one of his stuffed animal toys – when he started to poop fluff I knew there were not going to be any more stuffed animal toys purchased for him.  Then there was the wall – which I learned very quickly how to patch drywall – to say the least my patience was getting thin.  But how can you get angry when he greeted me with such love when I walked in the door. And those big sweet eyes filled with love.

My little Pekinese Munchkin (annoyed that there were no toys left for her to play with) is terrified of rain storms and especially thunder.  Living in Florida, this is often an issue during the summer rainy season.  Ok, I haven’t lost my mind. Just bare with me and I promise it is related to the Buckeye story.  My best friend saw on Animal Planet TV, a vest that is called a “compression vest” which in theory makes the animal feel protected by being wrapped and warm.  Well instead of buying the vest I tried putting on one of her little sweaters during the storm and to my amazement she didn’t shake or hide.  That got me to think, hmmmm wonder if this could work for Buckeye and make him feel secure. I also remembered how he would drag my dirty clothes around with him while I was gone so I figured what the heck I would give it a try.

Of course being a 73 pound Rottweiler mix, he didn’t have a little doggie sweater hanging around.  So after I woke up and got ready for work- I took the pajama top that I wore overnight knowing it had my scent on it and put it on Buckeye.  I tied his collar through the short sleeves to keep them from dragging on the floor and gathered and tucked the bottom then put a hair tie around it (so he didn’t pee on it if he went outside).  I had coated a bone with peanut butter and put it in the freezer over night and handed I it to him (and one to each other dog also).  He happily ran off with the bone and ignored me when I left for work.

I checked in with my roommate and my mom several times during the day.  They said he was like a different dog. My mom even had the nerve to ask me if I had drugged him.  I asked what did she mean?   I was told that he has been calm all day. He hadn’t destroyed anything, just slept peacefully on the couch, and let them know when he needed to go out.   Calmly chewed on his bones and deer antler chew but didn’t cry, bark or pace.

Not sure if it was just a fluke I tried it for a week with the same results.  I think I was on to something.  Just to test it- one morning I didn’t put my sleep shirt on him. I came home to two couch pillows torn to shreds.  

Needless to say – I now share my clothes with my dog on a daily basis.

BAZOOKA BUBBLE GUM

When I was a kid I loved bazooka bubble gum.  I know the taste didn’t last long and after a few minutes it was like chewing a piece of tar – but the first few chews were pure heaven. At least that’s how I remember it. I haven’t seen it in a while in the stores and certainly not the 2 cents I used to pay for a piece.  So I was so excited when I went to the pharmacy and saw they sold it in a small pack. I happily bought the pack and put it in my car so I would have it when I wanted a piece.  I kept it in the little side pocket on my driver’s side door and used it sparingly since it’s not easy to find anymore.

Buckeye loves to go for car rides. All my dogs do,  but Buck really really loves them. In fact if you just mention going for a ride you had better already be prepared to leave with your keys in hand otherwise he practically knocks you over jumping with joy.  He just can’t contain himself.  Once he is in the car he is calm (unless he spots another dog or we are parked in a space – that’s when my goofy dog who is afraid of a paper bag becomes the master protector of the vehicle- save that for another story).  I think that all the jumping around, barking running back and forth to the front door to where I have the leashes hung up tires him out. But the moment you mention a ride all hell breaks loose in the house.  He starts jumping and barking I swear its the sounds of pure happiness in his bark – it’s almost impossible for him to sit still long enough for me to click his leash on. And when I get the leash on the other dogs he grabs them and drags them to the front door also as if they forgot their way outside.

Well we all get loaded up in the car on our big adventure to the post office to mail a package – living in Florida I never leave my dogs in the car for any length of time – it gets too hot and they could die of heat stroke in only a few minutes, a very painful awful death and these are my babies.  I always wait till the late afternoon when it cools off to even think of taking them in the car.  Even then I still take a second set of keys to leave the vehicle running – no one is going to get near the car with Buckeye guarding it.

All three dogs know there places in the car. Almost like children knowing assigned seating.  The husky Zorro being the biggest (yes he is fat and overweight) sits in the back with both sides of windows open and walks back and forth between the two windows.  Buckeye gets the passenger seat, usually sticks his head out the passenger window letting the breeze hit his face and the slobber go flying backwards sometime even hitting the husky when he sticks his head out the back window on the same side – not very pretty by the time rides are finished. Munchkin is the easiest and most compact – she’s my 11lb Pekinese who just sits like a queen on an orthopedic pillow wedged in-between the two front seats covering what would have been cup holders.

It’s only a short ride but the dogs are so happy you would have thought I drove them across country.  I get to the post office – leave the car running with air-conditioning on, windows only open enough for them to get noses out, doors all locked and I run in to go mail my package before they close.  I parked right in front of the big glass doors so I can keep an eye on them from the counter.

That was quick; all finished now back to the car to drive home.  Hmmmmm something is weird usually Buckeye greets me at the window all excited that I have returned to the car.  But he’s sitting in the back, the very very back of the car, and lying down with his paws covering something and his head on his paws.  I go to the back of the hatchback and open it up so I can see what he has because, he is obviously hiding something – and looks guilty as sin.

I call him over, he gets up -  but hesitantly which means the darn dog knows he did something he shouldn’t have…. And there I see it my bazooka bubble gum box shredded all over the back – the majority of the gum chewed up and gone – bubble gum in the dogs hair and caught in between his teeth, his breath smelled like bubble gum and his one ear was stuck to the side of his head glued together by a piece he must have chewed and tried to get out of his mouth only to get it stuck in his hair.  Then I notice the other dogs who were both now sitting up in the front seat looking at me and wagging their tails, mouths wide in a grin as to say – mom it was all Buckeye, we didn’t do a thing, we are good dogs and buckeye is a bad bad dog……but the two of them have gum stuck in their hair also……l quickly pick up what’s left of the pieces of gum and the shredded box and toss them into the garbage at the post office. I know now what’s in store for me when I get home – I have to bath all three dogs and try to get gum out of all their hair without chopping up with scissors, making them look like a puppy punk rock band.

The entire drive home I kept picturing in my head the sort of contortionist position buckeye would have had to put himself in and the dexterity he would have needed to pull out the box of gum (without dropping anything in the front seat) because it was stored folded over, in the side pocket of my driver’s side door that actually sits low to the floor wedged in between the door and the driver’s seat.  In order for him to get that he would have practically been standing on his head upside down on his paws and somehow wedged his long snout down the side of the driver’s seat to work the box up to the top of the pocket to finally get it out and then had to dodge the other two dogs to get it into the back of the car. 

 All this and chew the gum and destroy the box in the less than 5 minutes I was in the post office.  The mental picture of him achieving this made me laugh and shake my head.

And people wonder why I prefer to usually leave the dogs home and not just take them for “only a short ride and it will make them soooooo happy”…..ughhhhhhhhhh